The Covid-19 lockdowns only made the yearn for external validation grow deeper but as we step into a New Year with the whiff of a fresh start in the air, Indo-Canadian YouTuber and talk show host – Lilly Singh revealed how to take back the control of one’s life. In her recent viral video, the “Bawse” lady spilled the beans on the ‘mantra’ that she developed in 2020 and is carrying forward into the New Year to thrive and be a happier person along with the 5 changes to make in 2021.
Lilly, who earlier went by the pseudo name ‘Superwoman’, took to her social media handle and shared a positivity boosting video as people around the world geared up for the first Monday of New Year 2021. “Good morning! Or evening! Wow. The world is huge. Today may be your first day back at work or your first day back at the hustle. It’s the first Monday of 2021 and it’s our chance to set the vibes (sic),” Lilly shared excitedly in the caption.
She added, “I changed these 5 things/habits in 2020 and it genuinely made me a happier person. I plan to take these 5 things (and more!) into the new year to thrive baby. Because a happy, grateful life, is the life I want to live. Hope you find some light in this video (sic).”
Mantra #1: What kind of life do you want to live?
Lilly calls it the simplest but the most powerful one with the correct phrasing with how you want to put or remove yourself from a certain situation. Giving an example from her personal experience, Lilly shared how the social media is her daily job but the online comments sometimes hit her.
However, she finds herself negotiating whether she wants to argue with the stranger online or “live a life with your phone down and pay attention to people around you in real life.” This framing made her pull herself out of the situation, put her phone down and focus on the people in real life.
Encouraging fans to use this mantra when stressed, Lilly promised that “the answer will become abundantly clear to you.”
Mantra #2: Call yourself out
Most of us have a habit of generalizing things with “it’s the end of the world” when a travel gets cancelled, when a project doesn’t go through or when we fight with someone. The knack is to identify the weakness or tiff in your brain by slamming the brakes on such thoughts instead of letting them consume you.
Lilly advises to “give yourself full permission to feel and act whack but do not act whack every day. Give yourself permission to feel anxiety, jealousy and all those emotions we run from because we feel it’s not good.” She advises so because it is impossible for anyone to never be stressed or tired or jealous or not have any negative emotions.
Feeling petty at a moment does not make you a petty person or the day a petty day or your life a petty life. Learn to embrace all the moments and do not define yourself based on what you did yesterday.
Mantra #3: Make gratitude the mood
Trying to make it rhyme, Lilly asserts that “the importance of gratitude is at an all time high especially where we are right now in the world. Where it is very easy to feel sorry for ourselves and we should, it’s been a tough time.” Citing the example of how people cribbed about taking their family, friends, outings, parties or hugs for granted and promised to never let it happen again, Lilly assured that two weeks into a normal world and we will once again be cancelling plans or avoiding people.
Though the negative is not on us or anyone in general, Lilly calls it human tendency to get used to things but the knack is to try and not get used to things by practicing gratitude because for a year now we have realized what it is like to not have things. Giving her own example, Lilly shared that every time she felt stressed, frustrated or felt sorry for herself in the past year, she would stop in that moment and count 5 things that she was grateful for that directly related to the reason she was stressed.
For example if she is frustrated about her job while on her way to it, Lilly recalled “having a job in the first place”, the easy commute of a car, having eaten breakfast before beginning the day, “telling jokes for a living” and getting to work with 100 other people as the 5 things in that situation that she was grateful for.
She highlighted, “No matter what it is you’re complaining about, there’s always a silver lining. I know it’s tough but next time you feel frustrated or stressed, I challenge you – whether you’re stressed about friends, parents, school, there will always be a silver lining. Whether it’s the opportunity to get education, whether it’s having parents in the first place, whether it’s all the good things and great things your friends did for you in the past, all the times they’ve been there for you in the past. The fact that you can call them on the phone that you pay for. Gratitude has to be the mood. It is the key recipe to success.”
Mantra #4 : Strict authenticity diet
We are trained to have some sort of façade when interacting with people, especially on social media, though we are not fake. We pretend to be happier, prettier or even more understanding than we actually are instead of just loving and honouring our raw authentic self.
Lilly suggests that instead of faking excitement or empty sentiments, she tried being real and it was way less exhausting and it was way more fun. So it was okay to not always say the right things nor have all the answers nor be the Superwoman always. It is okay to be scared or admit to being sensitive and genuine.
Mantra #5 : Pay attention to your energy
Make a list of things that prompted you to feel stressed or low in self esteem etc. This makes the pattern abundantly clear like Lilly realized that after talking to certain people, she would always feel a dip in her energy while hanging out with certain people or watching certain movies or listening to certain type of music made her feel good about herself.
This made her question herself on why was she indulging in things that made her sad though that does not mean to cancel out everyone in your life. “The cancel culture needs to be left in 2020, we are not bringing it in 2021” Lilly mused. However, she pointed out that we need to pay attention to things that make us feel invigorating and do less of the things that make you feel not great.
With this message of self care, self love and making us our own major project of 2021, Lilly Singh winded up the video which left fans introspecting for good. Which of these mantras are you going to imbibe?